Can I share a story with you from when I was secretly pregnant? As I'm sure you know, drinking alcohol while pregnant is a big "no no" and some gals even avoid alcohol while trying to get pregnant. So passing up drinks can be a tip off that someone is pregnant or trying.
During the first trimester, I was mostly able to dodge the questions. Yes, I/we may have avoided a few social situations so not to raise suspicions (i.e. skipping a work happy hour). A last minute trip to Milwaukee for John's friend's party? I was the DD since we drove back that night. But one trip and related social activities were completely unavoidable....my friend's wedding in Denver.
Leading up to the trip, we brainstormed different reasons that I wasn't drinking since my friends all know I enjoy a good craft beer. We homebrew, for crying out loud! And Denver is a mecca for craft beer!
The night before the wedding, we went to dinner at a Mexican restaurant with another couple and I ordered a "margarita." Meaning, I ordered the margarita, sent John to the bathroom, and had him tell the waiter to change the order to a virgin margarita. Disaster averted.
But....after dinner, we met up with a larger group of friends for dessert and drinks at The Cheesecake Factory. This time, the plan was to order a Bud Lite, have the waiter dump the beer, and refill the bottle with water. I've heard of coworkers successfully doing that at a happy hour, so it seemed like a good idea. Not this time.
Once a table opened up, the hostess walked our group to where we would be seated. As everyone was getting settled, John told the hostess our plan. She then told our waiter.
Once seated, the waiter introduced himself and asked everyone what they wanted to drink. Looking at John, he says loud enough for everyone to hear, "HEY! DON'T WORRY, MAN. I GOT YOU COVERED! I'LL GET HER A BOTTLE OF BUD LITE, DUMP OUT THE BEER, AND FILL IT WITH WATER BECAUSE SHE'S PREGNANT AND YOU DON'T WANT ANYONE TO KNOW YET! SOUND GOOD?"
I was so shocked at what came out of this high schooler's mouth that I didn't even know how to respond. John was livid on the inside, but managed to calmly and firmly say that he didn't know what this kid was talking about and that he had the wrong table. Unfazed, the waiter responded, "NO, MAN! THE HOSTESS TOLD ME IT WAS YOU!" Of course, everyone ended up ordering coffee or water.
Once the waiter left, the couple sitting across from us asked if we had any "big news" to share. Lying through my teeth, I denied the whole thing. Another couple tried to ignore the whole fiasco because she was pregnant and knew what could be going through my head if I was actually pregnant. We tried to pretend like the conversation never happened, but it was hard to forget since our waiter continued to make strange comments throughout the night.
At the wedding reception, we tried to keep things simple. John would get me a Sprite and asked the bartender to make it look like a mixed drink. Though pretending to sip wine at the table only lasted for so long. I don't know if we really fooled anyone because as we were saying our "good byes," the couple that asked us if we had anything excited to share at The Cheesecake Factory wished us luck and hoped that we would have some good news soon.
Busted.
If you take anything away from this embarrassing story, PLEASE DON'T OVER THINK THINGS!!!
Now that I have that off of my chest, I'd like to share what I am enjoying these days. Surprisingly, I don't miss beer at all. Though sometimes I'd like a little red wine. I'm usually content with just water or skim milk. If I want to mix things up, my favorite is Goose Island's spicy ginger ale. Who knew there was a wide world of craft sodas?! I've also enjoyed a few varieties of IZZE sparkling juice. Other times, I'll order (or make) a non-alcoholic cocktail. Mojitos without the rum are still pretty tasty. As for non-alcoholic beer, I'm not impressed. We've purchased Bitburger Drive N/A (with 0.0% alcohol) and I've barely touched the stuff.
If you've been pregnant, do you have a fool-proof excuse for avoiding alcohol?
Pin It
We just told our friends we were trying to get pregnant and I felt better avoiding alcohol -- which was true, but it quickly became the cover-up story too! I've tried some of the non-alcoholic wines, which are only okay. The Ariel brand seems to be better than Fre, but I haven't really been craving it. I think come summer, it will be tougher :)
ReplyDeleteMelissa - Surprisingly, we didn't think about that. I guess we wanted to avoid the topic in general.
ReplyDelete"Excuses" that we brainstormed, but didn't use include: I'm on a diet (I've never dieted), I'm on a medication that I can't drink (I rarely take medicine), and I'm training for a half or full marathon (never stopped me from drinking before, unless it was right before the race).
One real reason that worked during my first pregnancy was that I was just getting over being sick. But that only works for so long.
And thanks for the N/A wine recommendations. I've survived for this long, so I might as well wait a few more months for the real thing!
Ha! I didn't know that fake drinking was a thing (which was particularly hilarious when I read the post title!). I probably would have faked altitude sickness or something, but fake drinking sounds like way more fun.
ReplyDelete